Category Archives: Personal Decisions

One Year Later

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Second Chances

One year later we are in a much better place in our lives.  I call it “thriving after surviving” and I have used that phrase in my personal blog, which sadly I have not written for in quite a while.  I also use it in my Tuesday night Facebook Live segments at 7:30PM (shameless plug I know).  I call these segments “Thrive”.

I intend to repurpose blogs I have written and talk about these stories, I plan to talk about people I interview with my new podcast “They Dig Deeper” where people share their stories on doing good things without thinking about them, and yes, I will also bring my book on board eventually, just not today.

This is the year I looked back at all the times Larry and I were just expected to do what was asked of us and we did these things to keep the peace.

While Larry was in the hospital I listened to the concerns his kids had regarding how they feel about certain things their dad does or doesn’t do.  I listened, I took their concerns back to Larry and we discussed everything.  Newsflash, Larry is not really going to change that much, he is whom he is.  I throw little reminders at him from time to time but it is not my “job” to get him to do what other people expect.  In fact, when you want change, you need to be a part of that change.  It is not a one-way street.

Change is often inspired because something in your life is hurting you much like ill-fitting shoes pinch your feet.  Change also happens when you realize how old you are in actual years and think of all the things you still would like to do but time is not really on your side.  On year later we see this very clearly.

The latter hit us as Larry recovered from his open-heart surgery and his emergency exploratory thoracic surgery within hours.  We almost lost each other.

Lesson learned through all of this was that we truly only have each other and if we intend to make loving memories we have a second chance to do that.  We are moving forward with gratitude and appreciation of the fact that we have been blessed with another chance and we will take advantage of all that life has given us.  One year later our hearts are full.

What about devastating crises?  What if I had lost Larry?  I cannot answer what I would have done because it did not happen, yet life crises happen to all of us and unfortunately some do come with irreversible sad or tragic endings.  Can we thrive after these crises happen?  It depends on what lies inside of us.  Things will never be the same again and in times like this we may not make it through on our own.  There is no shame in asking for help.  I have been there, in fact I was there as recently as a year ago when I did some life counseling to understand some baggage I was carrying all these years.

Crises we survive and then move on to thrive afterwards often come with people making positive changes in their lives.  Whatever your higher power is, when you come face to face with what happened and are still standing above ground chances are you will make changes.

Do we regress?  You betcha we do, however with practice regaining your new direction in life is easy because you will feel that pinch again.  It is up to you whether you will kick off those shoes or keep wearing them thinking they will stretch and stop pinching, they won’t.

One year later this feels so good:

Kicking those pinching shoes off in life will feel so good.

 

 

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Getting My Butterfly Back

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Getting my butterfly back has not been easy.  My wings are tired, my energy levels are low, and I would like to go back into my cocoon.

 

 

It has been 5 weeks since my husband had open heart surgery to bypass two arteries that had given him problems in the past.  As soon as we knew he needed the surgery my inspiration in my work withered.  My motivation took a detour away from me and I found myself on a highway to Hell paved with the ups and downs of exhaustion, fear, stress, and yes throw in terror when he almost bled out and needed a second exploratory surgery.

 

Bringing him home 11 days later meant I became his caregiver, chauffeur, and all those other things he used to do but couldn’t (and still can’t in some cases for 3 more weeks.)

 

Now it has been 8+ weeks and I am in search of getting the butterfly back.  I had put two podcasts on hiatus.  In January I had started a new community project and that went on hold.  I also had a big light bulb moment to help grow my husband’s business and that also went on hold.  You know how that excitement feels when you have a brand new idea that you know is just fabulous and then you suddenly find yourself having to take a detour?  That is me.  I was treading water in a sea of disappointment.

 

I am on a mission to regain my excitement and I know it will happen but dammit I am not a patient person and I want it back now.

 

Yesterday while we were putting the finishing touches on our Federal Income tax filing Larry told me how this year it is imperative that we set aside money every time we earn it.  For the past 12 years we have attended conference after conference together and we had big travel expenses and good deductions to take.  Right now we have no business conferences scheduled because we have conference sized medical bills to pay for first.

 

This got me thinking about conferences in general and why it is important to be very selective in what you choose to attend and of course the cost involved which includes the potential for return on investment.

 

Without meaning to sound egotistical I do know many major thought leaders in the world of online marketing, podcasting, creating, because I have attended some of the biggest and best conferences in the country.

 

I selected conferences that gave me the opportunity to meet and talk with people I would never meet locally.  This is why I do not attend local conferences.  My business is national, make that international and in making this choice I have become actual friends with some super terrific people, I have had them as guests on my podcast show, and when I ask them a question, I get an answer.

 

I am not saying attending local conferences is a bad thing but you should be attending conferences where the person heading it is well-respected in the industry, and truly cares about helping the attendees succeed and not just the money.

 

Do your homework, vet the people speaking.  Vet the person holding the conference.  This is your money and you need to spend it wisely.

 

Choose a conference where you can meet people that can make a difference in your business.  We all go to learn so make sure that you are leaving with new ideas that you will use.

 

Conferences are an investment and while this year may not be a conference year for me, I do have my eyes on NAB next year (National Association of Broadcasting) and possibly a conference in podcasting as long as I can learn something new as well as meet exciting people I can build relationships with because I can have lunch with my local peers year round, but a stellar conference opportunity may come only once a year.

 

 

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Are People Leaving Social Media?

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We all need some stress relief.

Are people leaving social media?  That question has been dancing around in my brain because I am pretty sure I am not seeing as many friends engage with me as I had in the past.

I decided to ask Google.

I found nothing.  Google did not help me.

Last week two big thought leaders in social media announced on Facebook that they are going to stop following anyone who constantly brings up politics, argues politics, is ugly mean and hateful and I thought well that would remove half of my friends I am sure.

I understand why people make these decisions.  I have had a stomach ache myself for weeks.  I am fatigued.  I am stressed.

Yesterday I stood in the book aisle of my local Sam’s Club Store and I leafed through a great book that is an adult coloring book combined with beautiful peaceful quotes.  I did not buy it.  Damn.  Now I am heading back over there to buy it because I will carve out the time to color and focus on the quotes.  The title of the book is “365 Ways to Live in Harmony”.  It is filled with pages to color and brought me peace yesterday so I went back.

I spoke about adult coloring books on my latest podcast show episode today on http://thecrazymarketingladiesshow.com   Besides adult coloring books, reading a great book is a terrific escape.  Watching PBS shows like Masterpiece Theater and not a station that will blip in with the latest horrible thing that has happened also works.  Gardening, cooking, baking, walking, running, spinning, anything that takes you away from social media.  We all need to take breaks.

So are people leaving social media?  According to a thread I read today many are not necessarily leaving, they just are not using it. They are leaving temporarily.  What if you need it for business?  Well then you have a decision to make.

I created a list of people I do want to engage with and I labeled it the Kindness List.  I open Facebook and then I go right to that list, it is a mini-feed of kind people.

I also stopped following some people and I made sure I went into notifications and shut them down there.

There are things we can do, steps we can take.  We cannot control most of what is happening outside the boundaries of our own yards but we can control what happens inside the boundaries, right?

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The “Why” Behind my Decision to Change my Podcast

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long-journey

The Why Behind My Decision to Change my Podcast

Here it is almost the end of the year and I am “this close” to making the big reveal on the direction I am moving towards in 2017.  I need to finish my website design so I can submit it with my trademark application and then the big reveal will happen.

Part of this big reveal includes sharing some shows from 2 segment categories on The Crazy Marketing Ladies Show, ”Power Women Speak” and “Interviews with Successful Entrepreneurs”.  I realized a week ago that these shows were not working there for several reasons.

First and foremost was that Less Than 5 was more successful in downloads and truer to what I wanted a marketing show to be about.  I like having a Monday through Friday show and most of the time it is less than 5 minutes, until Johnny and I start talking and then it’s never more than 10 and soon to be never more than 15 or 20 – who knows?  We get to talking and we keep going.  Less Than 5 (or More) is not going away.  In fact I added another guest host on Mondays in content marketing.  Barbara Grassey aka The Book Boss is joining the show to give ideas on content marketing.

When I started TCMLS it was with 4 other women and all about marketing ideas.  Paths changed, people took new jobs, or moved.  It was a lot of work for me because editing and post production fell on my shoulders.  I tried adding several other people and I even discussed my feelings with Jared Easley, one of the biggest thought leaders in podcasting.  He told me to go solo, but I still wanted more than just me.  He said it would fly, I wasn’t sure.  It crashed.  It wasn’t anything anyone did or did not do.

Then I lost 8 great interviews due to who knows what and although I felt bad, I realized I did not grieve over the loss.  That was a sign that I knew things needed to change.

The third thing that happened in the triad of change was I listened to a podcast show I follow and my husband listened too.  The show was incredibly inspiring and filled with ideas.  About 1/4th of the way through it I hit pause and told Larry I was done doing the longer interview shows on TCMLS.

Many Power Women Speak and Interviews with Successful Entrepreneurs will be available on the new website and there will be a brand new podcast under the tab Power Stories.  I will be very selective in which shows make the cut because this new project has standards that must be met.

That was last Wednesday.  It all came together and fit perfectly into my new project to make these changes.  I read an article today that sums it all up.  The article was written in “O Magazine” by my mentor, Elizabeth Gilbert.  She wrote about a memory of her mother making the bed with fresh bedding before going away for a family vacation.  The essence of the story is that her mother wanted to come home to fresh bedding after all the work she would do on vacation.   Gilbert summed it all up by reminding us we need to be kinder to ourselves.  Making these changes in my podcast world is a way of being kinder to me and I have no regrets because awesome things are coming in 2017.

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